Guest post by Paloma Sharma:

Just when you’d face palmed your nose into oblivion, i.e., Voldemortland, that bunch of enlightened men and women (remember them?) are back with yet another ground breaking theory about rape that goes something like this:

I don’t feel any hesitation in saying that 90 per cent of the girls want to have sex intentionally but they don’t know that they would be gang raped further as they find some lusty and pervasive people in the way ahead.”  

– Dharambir Goyat

Right.

Somebody award this guy the Nobel Prize for Sensitivity.

What?

There is no Nobel for Sensitivity? Really? Hasn’t the fame of our legislators (inside and outside Parliament) reached international audiences? No? Well, now that Shri Dharambir Goyat has given us his Theory of Consensual Rape – yes, now even rape (definition: any act of sexual intercourse that is forced upon a person) is consensual – let us somehow forget that ever present white van us girls always have to look over our shoulders and watch out for – and find contentment in the fact that Mr. Goyat is not the only gem of a mind we have in this country.

The Bhoopinder Singh Hooda government of Haryana has produced another genius who (while not denying the Theory of Consensual Rape) has turned statistician and presented to us her thesis on Applied Conspiracy of Statistics (oh yeah, that’s a real branch of economics in Haryana.)

Who is this illustrious personality? Why, its none other than Haryana’s own Minister for Social Welfare, Education andWoman and Child Welfafe – drum roll, please – Geeta Bhukkal!

I believe that the way in which the statistics (on rapes) are being projected for Haryana, it is a conspiracy against the state. Such incidents (rapes) are taking place not only in Haryana but also in Uttar Pradesh, Madhya Pradesh and other states.

– Geeta Bhukkal

 

Yes. Rapes are a conspiracy against the Hooda government. No, I’m serious. Why else would they take place? Why!? Well, obviously because there are no other issues that the opposition can use against the Hooda government. What? DLF land deals? Are you kidding me? DLF plays golf with Haryana. Didn’t you know that? Eh? A skewed sex ratio? Puh-lease! This is how awesome Haryana’s sex ratio is:

See how many future leaders of Khaps Haryana is going to produce? Oh, so now Khaps are bad for wanting to “protect women” from rape by getting them married before 16 years of age? Meh. You people will never learn.

(Mumbles under breath) Guttersnipe…

 

For more posts by the author, kindly visit her blog, Going Bananas.

Comments
  1. […] A/N: This is a guest post I did for Justice For Women. (Yes, Banana People, moi is getting around. ) Rate this:Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like this. […]

  2. Aniket says:

    Hits the nail on the head!
    btw, your idea of Nobel Prize for Insensitivity for Nobel Prize has been copied by a lame ass website called TheUnRealTimes without giving credit to you!

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